We usually notice leadership through what we can observe, such as the person speaking from the podium, the assured voice in a meeting, or the name attached to a successful decision. However, some of the most important leadership happens before anyone has ever picked up the microphone; it occurs when someone builds trust, finds a way through a disagreement, or raises a sensitive issue with the person who has the power to act.
For many women, the decision involves an extra consideration: being straightforward might gain them authority. Still, it could draw criticism for being too assertive, while working quietly may help a proposal progress but might leave their contribution unnoticed.
Neither approach is easy, so neither should be recommended as the correct way for women to lead.
This is especially true when considering progress.
Although more women may take on leadership positions, traditional expectations regarding how a woman should behave still affect everyday decisions. A woman might hold a title yet still have to work harder to be heard.
She might influence a decision and yet see someone else get the credit.
While changes in representation matter, changes in recognition matter too.
In my study of silent leadership among Bahraini women, I focus on the space between speaking and remaining silent. Silence may be intentional, as a leader might choose the right moment, listen carefully, or address a delicate issue privately. The way she makes these choices can show that she has experience and common sense.
On the other hand, silence can also be forced on a person if they think speaking up would put their position, relationships, or reputation at risk.
It makes a difference.
When we praise women for being patient, diplomatic, and quietly effective, it may seem supportive. However, it is less supportive when we ask them to do essential work without being seen, having no authority, or receiving credit. We also cannot treat every quiet response as a choice unless we consider what would have happened if the woman had spoken out.
Not all leaders need to be louder. A sound organisation accommodates a variety of different approaches to leadership. It respects the individual who expresses themselves clearly in a meeting as well as the one who has carried out the careful work that led to an agreement. It lets women choose discretion when it suits them, while also ensuring they can disagree, ask for credit, and request promotion without suffering consequences.
It is possible to test these questions in practice. For example, who is invited to take part in the discussion before a decision is reached? Whose ideas are noted down? Who is responsible for dealing with tension? And when a project succeeds, whose name is recalled? Such questions tell us more about opportunities than a leadership position alone.
The Gulf is changing, and women are helping drive that change in many ways. Their leadership style cannot be summed up in one approach or narrative. While some take a public role, others influence people through their relationships and by using specific moments. Some do both, depending on what the situation demands.
Organisations should recognise this work and remove the pressures that make staying quiet necessary.
A woman can make a powerful choice when she decides when to speak, how to behave and where to apply her influence. Since she is only heard if she stays quiet, work remains to be done.
Mai K Al Khalifa
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